Hello and welcome to the Dr. Nurse Mama show, prescribing Hope for healthy families here on American Family Radio. Here's your host, professor, pediatric nurse practitioner, and mom of four, Dr. Jessica Peck.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Well, hey there, friends, and welcome to my favorite time of the afternoon, getting to spend time with you, prescribing Hope for healthy families. And we talk about hope a lot of times on this show, finding hope in today's world. But today we're talking about finding joy. Where has all the joy come? Joy gone? We sing joy to the world every Christmas, but what about the rest of the year? I know I just mentioned Christmas again. And while, I'm on this subject, I need to issue an apology to you, my listeners. So listen up, because I'm only going to say this once. I know that if you listen regularly, you know my love of Christmas. I love bringing joy to the world. And recently I was at the Astros game, you know my love for the Astros. I really do love baseball. And they had a Christmas in July night. And so we were having, ah, Christmas at the Astros game, and they had a survey there and they said, how many people decorate after Halloween and how many people decorate after Thanksgiving? There was no option before, before Halloween, so I picked after Halloween. And I was really shocked to learn that there were so many people in the world to pray for because 81% of you, 81% at least of the people at the baseball game said they decorate after Thanksgiving. So I am clear, very much in the minority. So I apologize for all of those times that I'm bringing up Christmas. But we're closer to it than we are away from it. But today we are talking about joy in the everyday sense. And if you were listening to the program yesterday, you heard me talk about how God has been bringing this message into my life repeatedly, and he is reminding me that I do not let. I do not need to let the enemy steal my joy. And we were right in the middle of a conversation yesterday. Every once in a while, I have a guest where I feel like at the end of the show, it's just kind of a record scratch, like we did not finish our conversation. And that was the case with pastor and author Jared Mitzelfelt. And so he is back today. He agreed to join us for a second day so that we could finish this conversation or at least see how far we can explore it really, to talk about the root of our joy deficit.
Why did the New Testament Church seem so full of joy and suffering while we today feel depleted
Why did the New Testament Church seem so full of joy and suffering while we today feel depleted? And more importantly, how do we Reclaim we've lost. And we remember that joy isn't the absence of hardship, it's the presence of Jesus in the middle of it. And I want to read to you from Romans 15:13, one of my favorite verses. May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him. So, Pastor Jared, thank you so much for joining us again. I am so grateful to have you back for a second day.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, thanks for having me, Jessica.
Yesterday, you defined joy as a supernatural emotion empowered by the Holy Spirit
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Well, we were right in the middle of a conversation, it feels like, and we didn't finish it. And we were talking about all of the things, you know, with joy, and you were giving us a definition. Yesterday, you defined joy as a supernatural emotion empowered by the Holy Spirit when we are deeply connected to Jesus and others. So if you missed yesterday's show, go back and listen to it. But, Jared, we were just about to talk about joy idols. Those are things that we are actively pursuing that are depleting us of joy. And so I would love to let you just pick it up right there and just give us some words of wisdom and conviction and what you learned in writing this book.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, absolutely. So, you know, going back to the definition, if we. If we understand that the joy is fundamentally about connection, specifically connection with Jesus, which is kind of tied to the John 15 parable that he gave his disciples and gives us as well, to be deeply connected to Him. The word that he uses is to abide in him as he abides in us, so to stay deeply connected. And as we see in John 15, verse 11, that when we are deeply connected to him, that his joy will be in us and our joy will be full. But it's also connection with others as well, but specifically with our pursuit of joy. Because we all desire joy, every single one of us, whether you are a believer or unbeliever, we all want joy. It's because we were all designed for it. God created us in such a way with different emotions that, we are to have these things, and joy is one of those emotions. But we were designed to find joy in Him. Now our hearts, are bent and broken. And so what happens is, instead of trying to find joy abiding in Jesus, we try to find joy apart from Jesus. And we see that all throughout the Bible. the person that I kind of zeroed in on, as far as joy idols, things that we're actively pursuing apart from God to give us joy, is Solomon. Solomon had everything that any of us could want from a worldly perspective and point of View, and he was incredibly blessed. But in his own words, it was all vanity. it was like smoke or vapor. and he was trying to obtain all these things and lots of things he did. arguably one of the most wealthiest people to ever walk the earth. Yet for him, as he was pursuing fulfillment and joy, he ended up being miserable. And we see that in Ecclesiastes, which is kind of his reflection, in his old age of all the things that he pursued. And all of it was meaningless to him. the words that he uses is like, ah, under the sun, which is apart from God. And so I kind of unpacked the different things that he pursued. And these are things that we pursue today, like money and possessions, food and drinks and entertainment and relationships and all sorts of things. Achievement, like these are things. Career, like these are things, things that we all want. And we all think that if we can just get the job, if we can just make enough money, if we can just have that coffee, if we can all just, if I can have this, whatever it is, then I'm going to have joy. And we're tricked into thinking that, and it's just not the case. and so we can talk more specifically about that. But that's kind of the overview of that chapter.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: It's so interesting to me because I've been sharing that over the summer I had the opportunity to walk some ancient paths and saw so many idols in so many places in the world. And I think it's easy to get judgy and think, oh, I would not bow down to a marble statue. But you do bow to the digital dominance of your phone completely. You know, we do chase those things and it's so difficult because really God has laid it out in his word, a simple way to find joy. You outlined that for us, what Jesus told his disciples in the book of John. But we're constantly trying to, to complicate it and counterfeit it and make it into something different. And all of these idols that we pursue, ultimately they lead to the loss of joy, but we still pursue them.
Technology is changing our kids worldview, and it's really scary
And I want, let's break it down for families. And I know you and I were talking a little bit offline last time and felt like we needed to bring the conversation on air where we're talking really about technology and especially about the way that the algorithm just feeds us content without us even having any intentional thought about it. It's changing our kids worldview. And you, you had some thoughts on that?
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, it is, it's crazy. And it happened really, really fast. You know, like, you know, if we, even if we look at zeroed in, like when smartphones came to be, like, if you look at the number of hours, someone would spend, with friends, like face to face, eyeball to eyeball, hanging out with people, 20 years ago we spent significantly more time with friends. But then like this drop off took place where now it's like significantly less. I think. Like it used to be 20 years ago it was like seven and a half hours per week we spend with friends. And then now it's like two and a half hours per week. And there is a pretty deep drop off in 2008. And, and you kind of scratch your head like what happened in 2008. Well, that's, that's when smartphones hit the market and it was accessible to everybody. And so, you know, what I like to say is like, that's when our phones became our friend, it became a replacement. And so young people, even adults too, that's kind of our default connection. And that's where, you know, we are texting, we're on social media, group chats, servers, different things, that we're desiring connection and wanting to be connected. And arguably we could even say like, we're the most, we're the most connected generation that has ever existed yet. We're the most lonely. Yeah, it's crazy. It's just crazy because it does, it isolates us. and there is something about being in the presence of somebody, in people and spending time with them, that technology can't do. There's emotions. You can't really have emotions through technology. there's just the presence. There's things that are missing that tech can't provide. and so we keep turning back to them. And for many people, even young people, this is all that they know. and so it's really scary. And even with AI, I know we kind of talked briefly about it, off air, but even with, ah, artificial intelligence today, you know, I'm not, I'm not running for the hills or, you know, or anything like that, but I think, it is something to talk about. I think artificial, like AI is also providing a, I mean, let's call it artificial connection with a robot, that people are finding, quote, ah, unquote, connection with, to meet their needs relationally. And it's really scary. and that again, talking about something that came really fast, AI just jumped on us and it's here and we have to deal with it. But it is also very scary, and we have to be really mindful of how it's being used.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Well, Jared, I think when we talk about technology and AI, you know, you have a chapter in your book called joy idols, and then you have one that talks about joy thieves. And I think this is kind of a combination of both, because we can treat this technology as an idol. We certainly spend enough time with it. We prioritize it over our personal relationships, but it also steals our time. I've been saying for a long time now that technology is the thing thief of time. I want to read something, just a short little excerpt out of your book where you talked about this. You said texting group chats, gaming servers, and social media are, tools to stay in touch with people, but they can't be our primary place for connection because they are insufficient. You can communicate information, but can't connect emotionally, which is needed. It's like we're all starving for connection, and we snack on our phones, thinking we're getting plenty to eat, but in reality, we're still starving. Have you ever considered why social media is called a feed? We are ever communicating, but never satisfied or full. Our phones are making us isolated and lonely. And I thought two things about this, Jared. I thought. Well, I thought a lot of things, but I'll share two. One is that not too long ago, we interviewed a mom who said her teenager came to her and said, I figured out this whole phone thing. We are just acting like information booths. You just go to one information booth and that teen downloads everything that they just got off their phone. And then you go to the next one and you download the information, but there's no real connection. And so I see. I see that happening. The other thing that I that struck me is that as people, we are made in the image of God that is imago dei. And again, we are trying to create a counterfeit. And this is concerning to me, Jared, because I see on social media, as we talked about a little bit before, that you can have an AI assistant is what they call it, and you can name it, you can train it to talk to you. And I see kids who are making an emotional connection. And even as I shared a guy who proposed to his AI girlfriend, which even feels funny to say because it's not even a real person. And when he proposed and she ish accepted, he was crying and crying because he couldn't believe that this had happened. And I thought, this is what happens when we create counterfeit idols and we allow them just to steal our joy. And so we, we are actually headed right into our first break, but we have so much to talk about. Jared, when we come back, I really want to dive into that and talk about some of those other things that steal our time. And you talk, you differentiate the idols as we're basically chasing that ourselves. The joy thieves are passive. They're just stealing our joy without even realizing it. We're talking about things like isolation and loneliness and our screens, our inner critic, our comparison, our complaining, our unforgiveness, our secrets and our pride. So you see, we have so much more to talk about.
Preborn Network offers free ultrasounds to pregnant women seeking abortion
And before we finish, I do want to talk about joy and suffering because there's so much suffering in the world. How in the world do we find joy? Well, I think we can look to your example of the first Christians, who certainly had things a lot harder than we do in this day and age. Listen, we're going to be right back with more from Jared Mitzelfelt. We're talking about his book Marked by Joy, discovering the joy that defined the first believers. Don't go away. We'll be right back. When a woman experiences an unplanned pregnancy, she often feels alone and afraid. So many times her first response is to seek out an abortion. But because of the generosity of listeners like you, that search may lead her to a PreBorn Network clinic. Preborn offers God's love and compassion to hurting women and then provides a free ultrasound to introduce them to the life growing inside them. this combination brings the ultimate miracle of life to life and doubles a baby's chance at life. Which is why preborn saw over 67,000 babies rescued last year alone. Meet Maddie. Maddie was in a tough situation as she wasn't sure who the father was. But after receiving counseling, prayer, and a free ultrasound at a PreBorn Network clinic, everything changed. Maddie discovered she had twins and found the strength she needed to choose life. Your tax-deductible donation of $28 sponsors one ultrasound. How many babies can you save? Please donate your best gift today. Just dial pound 250 and say the keyword baby. That's pound 250, baby. Or go to preborn.com/AFR, that's preborn.com/AFR. I can't resurrect. But just the.
>> Too Good To Not Believe by Brandon Lake and Cody Carnes: Mention of your name can raise the dead. All the glory to the only one who can Jesus it's You Jesus it's You Oh, I believe the wonder working God the wonder-working God for the miracles I see too good to not believe you're the wonder Working God, you heal because you love all the miracles. We'll see you're too Good to not believe.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Welcome back friends. That is too Good to Not Believe by Brandon Lake and Cody Carnes. And we're talking about finding a joy today, even in the midst of suffering, even in the midst of a world that seems to want to steal our joy or give us counterfeit idols in place of the joy that God wants to give us. And we can look at the example of the early church. It was not just surviving, it was rejoicing. Despite persecution and loss, their lives were marked by unshakable joy. Now what was their secret? Well, Pastor Jared Mitzelfelt is back today to tell us about that and unpack that biblical blueprint for joy that was found in the early church. And we're talking about how worship and community and the presence of the Holy Spirit really shaped their mindset and how we can reclaim that same vibrant joy today. Because joy is not optional for the believer. It is evidence of a life that is filled with the Holy Spirit.
Jared: What steals our joy is social media
And Jared, before the break we were talking about idols and starting to move into what steals our joy. And we talked about isolation, loneliness, technology. And I gave a few thoughts and I just want to give you a chance to respond and add anything else you think needs to be said.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, I think, I think our, our hearts are always looking for something to fulfill us that's other than God. And I think, you know, we talked about technology and AI and I think that is just such a big one that, that we think that it can meet our needs and it just cannot. we need the Lord and we need people. technology is something that is really appealing because it's always available, you know, and we get the hits of dopamine and there's less risk involved. You know, our phone isn't going to hurt us. So we think, and even with the AI relationships too, that we ended our last segment on, but even then, like, well, I can have a relationship with the robot because I know this robot's not going to hurt me, you know, and so there is just these counterfeits that are offered to us and they just will not give us the joy that we're looking for.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: They absolutely won't. And even thinking, oh, an AI robot's not going to hurt me. There are confirmed reports of AI robots grooming young children, of exposing them to abusive language, to violent language, to encouraging them to self harm. Because all of this AI is experimental. And if you stop to look at the terms of Use which in this day and age and culture, we're so accustomed, Jared, to just, you know, scrolling through all the way to the bottom. Yep. Don't want to read that. Don't want to read that. Click the box. Give my life away. Sure. And we are using this experimental technology as an, on our kids, and that is just not okay. And looking at the way that technology impacts it, we, us, we think it's not going to hurt us. But I think when we look through our social media scroll, one of the, the things that you say steals our joy is our critic, our comparison, our complaining, and our secrets. Those are just some of the things I see easily nurtured on social media because we have a critic that comes out that says, well, you don't look like this. You don't have this vacation, you don't have this money, you don't have this family. So we start comparing, we start complaining, we start to have secrets where we have that those can easily harbor online. Talk a little bit about.
Let's talk about the critic and how that inner critic steals our joy
Let's talk about the critic and, how that inner critic steals our joy.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah. So the critic is actually something that came out of my own experience with going to a Christian therapist. and so just going through a season many years ago just of really crippling anxiety and depression. And so my therapist had told me that, about the critic. And what the critic is, is really, it's like an accumulation of negative voices and experiences that have accumulated over time. And so we just have like, this voice in our, in our mind that's constantly making us overthink things, always, points out the negative, makes you assume the worst of things, reminds, you of failures. And so it's like this constant voice in your mind. And so it's a tool that the enemy uses in some way. You would say that the. This is purely just like demonic activity, which it could be, but it is something that we deal with, and it's a way that our mind and our heart deceives us because our heart is deceptive. And so, it. It makes us really lonely, you know, you know, even when you're trying to send a text message to somebody to, you know, go hang out with them, and you're constantly editing your text message because you're overthinking it because, you know, you get in the cycle and you're just thinking, you know, oh, they're gonna think this way, or, oh, I don't want to seem dumb, or it's just crazy, you know, and so. And then you Just start really thinking negatively about yourself, too. if you're a person like that, you know, put something on to go to church in and. Or you're just gonna go out with friends and you have to change like five times, you know, because your critic is telling you, oh, well, that doesn't look good. Oh, they're gonna think this way about you. Like, it's really unhealthy. And so it is. What I wanted to do in the book is I wanted to call it out and say what it is so that people can say, hey, I'm not going to listen to that voice anymore. I'm not going to let that voice dictate what I do and what I say. I'm going to reclaim who I am in Christ, and I'm going to listen to what he says about me. I'm not going to listen to my critic. I'm going to listen to my Creator. and so that was a really freeing thing for me. that was helpful. And so I wanted to share that with others as well.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: And you did. You shared it in the book and gave some transformative statements which remind me of Romans 12, that we have to renew our minds. It's not enough just to limit the critic and silence it. We've got to replace it. I love how you say that with the Creator. So, for example, you say things like, your critic says you are not good enough. Your creator says, Jesus was enough. Hebrews 10:14. Your critic says you're a failure. Your creator says, you're not defined by your failures. First John 3:20. Your critic says you're ugly. Your creator says, you're beautifully and wonderfully made. Psalm 139, 14. And you go through many of these statements, talking about that and giving the comparison of what the critic says. Because you're right, our heart is deceptive of all things. And then we have Satan, who's the father of lies, who's feeding it lies that we are then pulling in. And that leads to comparison and complaining, doesn't it?
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah. Oh, absolutely. Yeah. I mean, that's specifically comparison. our critic will constantly say that you're not good enough. You know, you're not pretty enough, you're not smart enough. Because we're constantly comparing ourselves to others, whether that's people that like relationally, like we're around, like family or friends or people at church or again, going back to online. Like, that's where comparison is fed, you know, because we're constantly looking at pictures and images of other people and Everybody's best. You know, that's on social media. And then we look at our lives, we're like, oh, well, I'm not. I don't measure, up. And so, comparison is really, really difficult. I think everybody deals with it in some form or fashion, and it's just hard.
Jared says complaining can be a joy thief because it blinds us
And then going into, complaining. Oh, complaining, I think, is another one where, you know, not me. One of those things. Yeah. Oh, yes, Me, me, me. Like, I. Yeah, that was a hard one to write because it was. For me, it was a pruning, that the Lord had to do on my own heart of how, much I complained and what complaining does, it actually shows you what you feel entitled to. and for us, and for me personally, like, I really like my comfort. And so when my comfort gets challenged, that's when I complain. and I kind of share it in the book, too, of the Israelites, when they were in the desert and they had just been freed from slavery, like a m. Miraculous event of the parting of the sea. And they're saved, and then they're. They're hungry and they're thirsty, and they're like. And they're complaining, and they want to go back to Egypt and go back to slavery because he was in some form of comfort to them. And it's like, you know, and we can point our finger at Israel, but it's like, man, I. I do that on the daily. I complain about a lot of things. Like, if my food. If I'm at a restaurant and the food is not done timely, I'm gonna complain about it, you know? Or if my drink at Starbucks is wrong, like, I'm gonna complain about it because I feel owed, you know, I. Or if it's hot outside, I'm gonna complain. And we live in Texas, so it's hot all the time, you know, and, And so we. We complain about what we feel entitled to. And. And what happens is. And this is where it comes back to joy. when we complain, we are blinded from the goodness of God because we're only focused on what we don't have or what things are not going our way. And we don't see the goodness of God. Like the Israelites, they forgot about what had just happened. Like, God just liberated them. They're free, but they were only focused on what they didn't have, which was food and water, and forgot about the goodness of God, of what he had just done for them and what he could do, you know, he could provide more. And so for us, when we complain. We're blind. We blind ourselves from the goodness of God. And when we focus on the goodness of God, that's what gives us joy. But when we're not focused on those things, that's when complaining can be a joy thief. And we do it all the time.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: We do it all the time. It's so true. And where I struggle, and I know a lot of other families struggle is, you know, it's easy to say, like, oh, I don't complain about, you know, just something lofty or ethereal or, you know, like, I don't complain about, you know, money or whatever. But what I do complain about a lot, Jared, is my family. And that's terrible because I'll see other people, you know, doing something on social media like, oh, well, their mom invite, you know, their daughter invited them to that. Why didn't. Why, you know, their daughter had this picture with them, or their son did this, or, you know, they went on this vacation or that dad did this. And, you know, why doesn't mind. And then I start to complain to my kids, well, why can't you do this? And, complain to my husband? Oh, why can't you do this? And I start to see that complaining and comparison trap, like, just come to swallow me whole instead of, as you said, seeing the goodness of God, the way that he has uniquely gifted my family, and recognizing that we're falling for the trap of believing everybody else's highlight reel. Because I know this happens, Jared. I know it happens because I've been that mom where I'm trying to take a picture of my kids and I'm telling them, stop hitting your brother. Why can't you just stay still? You know, why did you have to wear something that wasn't matching? And then, you know, posting it on social media with the hashtag, family time. Such a great thing together. That's sinful. That's just terrible, Jared. We have got to stop doing that. But it's just real.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: I agree with you. It is real. It is real.
The other thing that really, you know, steals our joy is unforgiveness
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: The other thing that really, you know, that steals our joy is unforgiveness. And I remember this very specific time where there was a woman, that I knew who had a perceived offense against me. And it actually is a long story, but it turned out not to be true. She was told something about me that I said something about her that wasn't true. Doesn't this sound just like, you know, petty gossip? Right? This is where we are. But she harbored that for a really long time. And so one Day she wanted to talk to me about it. Now she was talking to me about it. She was just weeping and just saying, I have been carrying this bitterness towards you, this unforgiveness. And Jared, it just really struck me in the moment because I thought I didn't even know. I wasn't impacted at all. And yet you were carrying this around and just burdened by it. and I didn't even know. So talk a little bit about how unforgiveness and secrets and pride, those are the other things. How do you see those stealing our joy?
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, Unforgiveness is a really big one, you know, it is a poison in our heart and it only hurts us, you know, for the most part, it does affect other people. But it, the illustration I gave was like when Deion Sanders a couple years ago was talking to the press and he was, he told the press that like, hey, I keep receipt. Which is like sports smack talk for like, I know all the people that have said something negative about me and my program and we're gonna, we're gonna get back at you on the football field, you know, Ah. Which I love from a, as a sports fan. But it's also reflective of like, how we, how we keep receipts when people wrong us. Like, we keep a record of wrong. And when we keep receipts, it's like, well, you owe me, you know, like you owe me an apology, you owe me money, you owe me so and so. And so we hold on to those things. And it is like, it is like the common thing that said is like, it's like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Or gets hurt. And it is a poison in your heart. In it, you foster bitterness and contentment and not, contentment, discontentment. Yeah, there you go. But yeah, like, your heart is just restless and there's a heaviness. And we just walk around with it. And a lot of times, like the example that you gave, like, a lot of times, like you, like you said, perceived hurt. Like somebody will not even know they did something or not did something. And the person is like holding on to it.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Yeah.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: and the person that was supposedly the one that did the offense, like, has no idea. And that is something that disconnects us from people. And what I see today too is like going along with unforgiveness is we see this in church culture. That's definitely in the culture because the culture created it, but it cancel, ah, culture. Right. And so if you hurt me, then I'm going to cut you off, you know, like, I'm not going to talk to you, I'm not going to spend time with you, and you isolate from that person. And that's like getting back that at them, you know, and that's just so unhealthy and so unbiblical, you know, and, and that is that that cultural, idea in practice has influenced church culture. I, see it all the time. And it's destructive. And instead of working through, conflict, we just run away from it. And we. And because of that, we're just left with really shallow relationships.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Oh, that makes me so sad. But we have joy on the other side. Don't worry. When we come back, we'll have more help and hope on the way. And Jared, you're so right, because in 2009, the word of the year was unfriend, which is something that technically you did on social media, but that has bled over into culture and in real life and as you sadly said, in church culture. But when we come back, we'll talk about finding joy in suffering, even in disconnection in church culture. More with Jared Mitzelfelt when we come back.
Dr. Ligon Duncan says the Bible accurately diagnoses our sin
Here's Dr. Ligon Duncan from the American.
>> Dr. Ligon Duncan: Family Studios documentary the God who Speaks. I think the most striking thing to me about the Bible is that it not only reveals God to me, it is God speaking to us, revealing himself to us. But in the process of teaching us about himself, he reveals so much about who we are. I often tell people that one of the ways that I know that the Bible is true is the way that it diagnoses my sin. I'm often reading through a passage and I'm thinking, this was written 3,000 years ago, and yet it perfectly diagnoses the state of the sin of my heart. The only way that can happen is if my creator is actually the author of the book. Visit thegodwhospeaks.org.
>> Because He Lives (Amen) by Matt Maher: I believe in the son. I believe in the Risen one. I believe I overcome by the power of his blood Amen. Amen. I'm alive. I'm alive because he lives. Amen. Amen. Let my song join the One that never ends. Because he lives.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Welcome back, friends. That is because he lives. Amen. Ah. By Matt Maher
Today we are talking about the joy that we can find in today's world
And we are talking about the joy that we can find in today's world. Because, look, we were dead in the grave, but mercy called our name. And today we are calling you to a life of joy. And how do we actually live that out? So in this final segment, we're going to turn the corner from reflection to action and talk about some practical, scripture rooted steps to help you cultivate joy right where you are. Because we know that everybody's battling something. This world can be a dark and depressing place. And Pastor Jared Mitzelfelt has shared some of his own struggles, his health struggles, his mental health struggles, with really courageous transparency and authenticity. Because life is broken and life can be hard. And so whatever it is that you're battling, if it's burnout or you're navigating grief or you're just feeling stuck in a rut, joy can still be yours. And so I want you to get ready to take a hold of the life that God designed. A life filled with lasting, resilient joy. And that's what we're calling you to do today. That's the prescription for hope. Be someone who others see as marked by joy. If you want more on this, get a copy of Jared's book marked by Joy discovering the joy that defined the first believers. And we've been talking about some of the chapters in this book. Joy idols, joy thieves, and Jared, let's talk a little bit about joy and suffering.
You wrote that Paul in the Bible wrote the most about joy and suffering
You wrote that Paul in the Bible wrote the most about joy and suffering, and you wrote this. Now, Paul, by the way, he was whipped with 39 lashes five times, beaten with rods three times, stoned one time, arrested and imprisoned too many times to count. He endured dangerous journeys at risk for his life involved being shipwrecked three times and stranded adrift once. Countless sleepless nights, starvation and dehydration and freezing conditions. He was even bit by a venomous snake once, but didn't die. Now that is not a conversation starter for joy. Jared, how did he write about joy in those circumstances? And here we are saying, yeah, but, you know, it's just, it's hard today. Like, it doesn't seem like it has the same ring.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, it is crazy. And it just doesn't even seem possible, does it? Right, yeah.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Shipwrecked three times.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah. I mean, it just, it seems crazy. And you. And we would even say, like, if we encountered Paul today, like, if he like, showed up at our church and he's experienced this and we know his story and he was just overflowing with joy, we would think that he was crazy, you know? Yeah, I'm serious.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: I think that's plausible.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: But he, but he, but he did. He had this genuine joy, that he, that he wrote about. And, you know, I think it is like, if we look at, in Philippians, which is the letter where he uses joy the most, he tells us and even commands the. The church in Philippi to rejoice in the Lord always, I will say rejoice. And I think that's the key is like, he's not rejoicing in his circumstances necessarily. He's rejoicing in the Lord in his circumstances. And so no matter what is happening to him, he's rejoicing in the Lord because of the Lord's goodness to him. and that the Gospel, no matter whether it is, by affliction or if things are going well, like the gospel is being proclaimed and being received, and that gave him joy. and he had this mantra of life that we see in Philippians 2. Just like, to live is Christ and to die is gain for him. his life was so devoted to the Lord and to the ministry and to the people, that he was serving, that he had joy doing that. But even if he were to die, he knew that he would be reunited with Christ. He had that hope. and that gave him overflowing joy too. And so that just even looking at the life of Paul, that's something that for all of us ought to reflect on. Of. You know, am I. Am I looking for my circumstances to give me joy, or can I have joy in the midst of. No matter what the circumstances are, have my joy in the Lord again, going back to that connection with the Lord. and so that's a big takeaway from Paul for sure.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Well, you know, it's hard because sometimes we're facing things that really should not steal our joy. Things that are trivial, things that are first world problems, as we would say. But there are people who are going through some really tough things. Relationship loss, grieving, the death of a loved one, health issues. I mean, just some really serious things. Abuse, trauma, all of those things. But looking at the example of Paul, and you quote from the scripture, where he reminds us, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance and endurance produces character, and character produces hope. And hope does not put us to shame because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. And sometimes I feel like we can look at these biblical characters and we think, how do they relate to our lives? But they really do.
How do Christians find joy in the midst of suffering? What do early church leaders teach
And one character that I'm learning a lot about joy from this summer is actually Corrie Ten Boom, who has died and gone on to be with the Lord. But she was in a concentration camp during World War II and just get. If you haven't read her book the Hiding Place, I highly, highly recommend it because she's continually talking about joy, finding joy even in the worst circumstances that most of us couldn't ever possibly imagine. And she talks about even after getting out of the concentration camp and one of the worst abusers meeting her and wanting to apologize to her and she thought, I cannot, I cannot forgive the things that you did. And thought about the shame and the abuse that she had endured. And as she was thinking that, she said she just pictured Jesus on the cross enduring abuse and shame and scorn for her. And how could she not do that? And so how do we find joy in the midst of suffering? What do these early church leaders and Christians teach us about how we can do that today?
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah, I, I think there is also, I'll say this too, I think there's a misconception that, that we ought to be jumping for joy all the time. You know, like we, like for example, we went through a pretty tragic event in our family, ah, a few years ago. And you know, in that moment, like we're not jumping for joy now. It doesn't mean that that joy is not absent, you know, but it is not the strongest emotion that we're feeling at the moment. And so I would say like, if anyone is dealing with struggles, or grieving, like we are to not avoid those emotions, but we are to feel those emotions not in isolation, but we're supposed to feel those emotions with the Lord and work on, work through those emotions with the Lord. And that's where we do find that joy is because when we press into the Lord and we spend time with the Lord and we run to the Lord with all of our raw emotions that we're feeling, that's where we get, find the deeper connection. Then if we have a deeper connection, then we have that joy that comes through. Because yet again it's Jesus's joy, it's his joy that comes through us, in us, through the Holy Spirit. And so, you know, don't, let's not run away from those feelings, let's deal with them. even, you know, if we look at the Psalms, two thirds of the Psalms are lament, they are, they're crying out for the Lord, for help, for different circumstances and very raw and honest. And so, I think that we see, we read the New Testament and we can kind of feel like man, like I, I'm really missing it. But I think if you look at the Bible as a whole, we're supposed to deal with hard things with the Lord. And then in the midst of that, our tears of sorrow will turn into joy. and for the church in general, too, like the early church, they were abiding in Jesus. Paul was abiding in Jesus. Peter was abiding in Jesus, John was abiding in Jesus. They were living out the command of the Lord. And they were also deeply communal. And so they were not dealing with their struggles, the persecution, the hardship of not being able to, do business with people because they were Christian and so they weren't making money. the discrimination, slander, all the things. None of those people were dealing with those things alone. They have the Lord, but they also had the church. And I think that the big part of it is we're not supposed to deal with those things, those hard things alone. But when we do go through it, the Lord is with us. And his spirit is so tender and kind and brings comfort. and our relationship with him goes deeper than otherwise it wouldn't. and then we have people around us too, that are helping and bearing burdens and encouraging and weeping with us. and it's such a comfort and it's such a joy that we are not alone. And that's why I think that we see, the joy that we see in the first century church, a big part of it.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: Yeah, we talked about that yesterday with the commitment that they had to one another and, the fellowship that they had with each other. And I think about that bear one another's burdens, in so doing, fulfill the law of Christ. I also was thinking of Nehemiah. The joy of the Lord is our strength. And it's not about, like you said, jumping for joy. I'm kind of thinking about that song, you know, I don't know. I don't know what generation you come from, Jared, but I come from the. I got joy down in my heart. Deep deep down in my heart. You know, where you're supposed to be now. I put that earworm in everybody's ear for the rest of the day.
Jared writes about how suffering makes us stronger and how pruning helps
But some of the things that you walk us through in the book are how suffering makes us stronger. Trials strengthen our faith. Trials test the strength of our faith. Trials boast of Jesus power. Suffering shapes our character by pruning. And you had some great examples of pruning on there, actually. You shared an example of, calling someone a moron when they were driving. And, I have the distinction, Jared, of my kids telling their teacher at school that I cussed at Someone, when I was driving, the, cuss word that I used. Okay, everyone cover your ears. Was gumball. All right? Because I was trying so hard not to say, like, you know, you jerk or whatever, and I said, you gumball. And so my kids have never let me forget it. And you talk about, you know, you bring. You bring the word from James. Abiding joy. With abiding joy. The tongue. Oh, sorry. With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings who have been made in God's likeness. And you give a great way of. How do we abide in joy and all of those things? With the. With our tongue and our thumbs, with our eyes and our ears. And there's so much great practical guidance in there. So you want to own up to that now, Jared?
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: Yeah.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: We just told all your secrets here.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: I'm being tested on the daily on that. So it's good. It's all good. No, I try to connect. Like when I wrote. I try to. It was reflected too, of, like, these are things that I struggle with as well. And, you know, with my kids or just driving on the interstate, you know, or whatever it may be, it's like these, these are real. And, and, you know, we talked about joy. Thieves and joy, idols and things. But we also know, like, there's things that we could actively do to help us have joy as well. And I kind of outlined that in the Abiding joy chapter. And, you know, there's. There's lots of things just like, holistically, you know, like mind, body, soul stuff. and so, yeah, it's our whole selves when we abide, it's not just a part of our lives, but like Jesus, it's all of our lives, you know, And Jesus is everything to us and he's in everything. And so, so much of our lives. Like, Jesus is just a part of our lives. Like, you know, Sunday mornings or Wednesday nights or when we have Bible study stuff. But no, like, it's everything. Like when you're washing the dishes or when you're driving the car, when you're going to a meeting or writing an email, like, he's a part of all of it. Like, we invite him into those things and that he's the filter in which we do those things. man, there's just so much joy available. And that's what we see in the church too, is like everything. Everything was. Everything they did was for the kingdom, you know, everything was kingdom minded. and so that's something that we can adopt today as well.
>> Dr. Jessica Peck: You know, you really gave me an epiphany yesterday when we were talking about. When you were Talking about John 15 and talking Jesus, you know, gathering his disciples, knowing that his time was not long in the world, and talking about I am the vine and you are the branches. And, you know, anybody who's grown up in church or done some Bible study, we know that passage. But connecting it to me was really, transformational yesterday. I just want to tell you that Jared, because he goes on to say all of those things about abiding. Abiding. But then verse 11, I have told you these things so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. And then he goes on to say that, you know, greater love has no man than to lay his life down for his friends. And he was going to do that. And I think about the verse that says, yet for the joy set before him, he endured the cross, despising its shame, and now he's sitting at the right hand of God. And Jared, I just want to thank you so much for spending this time talking because I think, think this is something that is really impacting American families on a daily basis, is having a lack of joy. So if you feel like you're in a rut and your family is having difficulty finding joy, I encourage you as parents to step out and lead. You can start by getting a copy of Jared's book marked by Joy, Discovering the joy that defined the first Believers. You'll find a lot of practical, humor and heart touching examples where Jared shares his own journey in finding joy and following that example that was left to us by, by the first believers, by the first members of the church. And it's been so encouraging to me. I hope it's been encouraging to you. And I hope that wherever you are, the Lord will bless you and keep you and make his face to shine upon you and call you to a life of joy. I'll see you right back here tomorrow.
>> Jared Mitzelfelt: The views and opinions expressed in this broadcast may not necessarily reflect those of the American Family association or American Family Radio.
